Life is always moving forward. I recently read a book by Wayne Dyer and he talked about life like a flowing river. Sometimes it is slowly moving forward and sometimes it moves fast but it’s always moving forward no matter what. And you can either enjoy the ride or drown. Let me explain.
Every day the sun goes down and another day lost in your life. You can’t stop the clock, you can’t stop the sun from rising the next day. Time is forever moving forward, but are you?
Seven years ago, I realized I wasn’t moving forward. I got into a rut. I felt like I had nothing to look forward to. We have all been there. I was on the river called life but I was stuck and I was drowning. Drowning in sorrow, hurt, pain, and even debt.
Because I was holding on to my past. The one thing that we all forget, no matter how much we hold on to the past, things will continue to move forward. Even at our death, people will not stop living just because you are gone. People will be hurt and sad, but they will continue to get up and get moving. Life never stands still. It is always moving forward, flowing like the river called life.
Picture your past pains, your past hurts, your past trauma as pebbles or rocks. Some are small, some are medium size and some are big and painful. No matter how big or how small the rocks are, and depending on how many you are holding on to, they are holding you back. In my case, I was holding on to a lot of these painful rocks and it was weighing on me. I spent years of my life with no direction because I was stuck in my past and everyone else was moving forward. I carried every hurt and every pain and every traumatic event in my pockets. Stacking them, a small pebble here, a big rock there, a medium rock in my back pocket. Every year, more rocks were stacked into my pockets. I carried so much weight that I stopped moving forward on the river called life.
And guess what? I was the only one holding on to these pains. The people who created that pain in me, they were busy floating on the river without a care in the world. Yet, I was in the back of the river, unable to move. I was holding on to so many rocks, I was drowning.
Are you in the back of the river too? Are you allowing the river of life to pass you by? How many rocks and pebbles are you carrying?
Most of us live in this existence, we spend years and most of our lifetime with shame, guilt, hurts, pains, traumas holding us down, holding us in the same place unable to move forward. We end up drowning and dying with all of our dreams and hopes. We struggle to truly let go of our past because we are afraid if we drop the rocks and the pebbles, the river of life will over take us. We allow the fear of failing, the fear of judgement, the fear of the unknown to keep us from allowing ourselves to float into our full potential. We hold on to our painful past and never allow the river of life to move us forward in the direction we need to go.
Look, I know that this journey called life is hard sometimes, it throws us some major roaring rapids and sometimes we are tossed in the river not knowing which way is up and which way is down. During those moments when the river is rapidly moving forward, we need to remember that we are resilient human beings. Blessed with the tools of survival. We need to trust that we have survived these rapids before and will survive this too.
Are you ready to release those rocks?
I have released so many rocks and pebbles. I am learning to swim and float with the flow of life. I am learning how to move forward and not pick up new rocks.
One thing I have learned is that everyone has a story. I am not trying to diminish the pain you experienced. But after many years, I finally figured out that everything really does happen for you and not to you. Life is about growing, learning and moving forward. Yes, it sends you painful lessons but I have learned that every rapid has taught me how to be a better swimmer. I am here to tell you, that those rocks you are holding on to are not helping you. They are drowning you. You will never be able to swim into your full potential if you continue to hold on to the past.
I understand that some of the rocks are hard to let go of. We all have endured similar sadness, trauma or hurt in our past. But instead of carrying the heavy weight of those rocks, look at them as lessons and the people who hurt you as teachers. Honor your story and every character in your movie called life. In fact, embrace it and share it.
By sharing your story, you will find out that you were not the only one who experienced similar pains, hurts or trauma. You will discover that all of us at one point in our lives have drowned in the dark part of the river. You will also discover many courageous and brave people who survived the dark roaring rapids that tried to drown them and they moved forward despite it. Looking back, I am thankful for all that happened to me, I learned so much about myself. I learned how to swim, how to float and how to let go and move forward with my life.
Release the rocks and flow with the river of life. And let the adventure begin.